Pursuit: The Vow
As we look forward to week 2 in current series of messages titled “The Vow“, this week we start to talk about pursuing our Spouse.
Guys you remember always trying to scoot closer to your date, buy her nice things, and stumbling over your words trying to not look as silly in love as you were. And ladies you remember the care and detail you took in getting ready for when “he” was coming over, how you flirted in conversation and how your heart would beat faster when your hands touched. That was part of the pursuit!
So, for some fun, below in the comments share some of the stories of how you pursued your spouse when you were still dating each other. They can be romantic stories where you went over the top, or funny stories where you tried and maybe came up a little short, lol!
Paul and I met online – he lived in Alabama and I lived in Pennsylvania, about 16 hours apart. When we finally decided it was time to meet in person, we determined that it would be easier for me to travel to him than vice versa. So I drove – by myself – 16 hours one way – in a 78 Ford Grenada – with no radio OR air conditioning! I had his picture taped to my dashboard for motivation.
We just celebrated our 10th anniversary last October. That long drive was worth it.
I was managing an Applebees here in Atlanta. Dianna was teaching during the day and wanted to wait tables at night. Another manager hired her while I was on vacation…when I saw her I said "hmmmm" I bought her a fudge brownie and promised a cruise if she would ask me to marry her. She did. Company policy was management could not date the wait staff…so I fired her:) year later we married and that was 19 yrs ago. Yes we did the cruise.
About 2am, during finals week (college final exams) I put up 4 poster signs on trees along the walking route my wife (girlfriend at the time) took to her morning class at CSUF. The signs read, in order, 'Hey You', 'Yea, You!', 'Good Luck on Your Finals', and 'You're going to do great!'. One of the signs stayed up for months because it was so high that no one would climb to get it down. Yea, I could sleep that night…laying in my bed with anticipation…waiting for 715am to roll around and for her to see the signs on the way to her finals. [One of her love languages is: Words of Affirmation...so, I was sealing the deal with those signs!]
About 2am, during finals week (college final exams) I put up 4 poster signs on trees along the walking route my wife (girlfriend at the time) took to her morning class at CSUF. The signs read, in order, 'Hey You', 'Yea, You!', 'Good Luck on Your Finals', and 'You're going to do great!'. One of the signs stayed up for months because it was so high that no one would climb to get it down. Yea, I couldn't sleep that night…laying in my bed with anticipation…waiting for 715am to roll around and for her to see the signs on the way to her finals. [One of her love languages is: Words of Affirmation...so, I was sealing the deal with those signs!]
About 2am, during finals week (college final exams) I put up 4 poster signs on trees along the walking route my wife (girlfriend at the time) took to her morning class at CSUF. The signs read, in order, 'Hey You', 'Yea, You!', 'Good Luck on Your Finals', and 'You're going to do great!'. One of the signs stayed up for months because it was so high that no one would climb to get it down. I lived like 45min away. When I got back home, I couldn't sleep…laying in my bed with anticipation…waiting for 715am to roll around and for her to see the signs on the way to her finals. [One of her love languages is: Words of Affirmation...so, I was sealing the deal with those signs!]
how creative! love it!
My wife and I met online. It's a long story, but I will say that it was all God's will!
I remember my first date with my future wife. It was actually a movie night WITH her whole family at their house. We sat next to each other, and I remember the pinnacle of the evening being the moment our pinkies interlocked… I know…
Also, the movie was “Sixth Sense” which I was SURE everyone had seen.
Her father hadn’t.
Needless to say, his first impression of me after I blurted out “can you believe Bruce Willis was dead the whole time” dropped significantly
*pinkies interlocked* = priceless!
Now that is simply awesome…
My wife and I met as camp counselors at a christian camp in the summer of 2001. She is/was legitimately the only girl that ever gave me butterflies in my stomach. She was secretly voted the hottest girl counselor by all the guy counselors, and when I shared with my guy friends that I liked her, the stakes were even higher. Especially since I was no where near the top of the "hottest guy counselors of 2001" list.
As I began my pursuit, I failed in every way possible. I tried to be cool, and ended up looking like a tool. I tried to be distant and she thought I was a jerk. I tried to act like a male model, but I was never an ambi-turner. The only thing that worked was note passing. The best part was we were not allowed to let the kids know we were dating, so I had them secretly deliver her notes. It was something that still holds a special place in our hearts. We have kept some of those letters of our early love. I was such an idiot, but can you blame me? She was WAAAAY out of my league.
I met my beautiful bride at a Fuge camp at Riverside, CA in 2002 . She lived in Phoenix and I lived in KY. We didn't really talk a whole lot at camp, but she had my attention from the moment I met her. She gave me her address at the end of the camp and said "I never give my address out so you better write me" (which was a total lie I found out later. Five months afterwards I finally worked up the nerve to write her a personal letter. She still has it to this day and for some reason I quoted Romeo and Juliet and drew a picture with some bees. What attracted her to that I'll never know, but it was somehow love at first 'write.'
My husband and I are high school sweethearts. Before we were dating, I had the biggest crush on him, and did everything I could to be where he would be (stalker-ish, I know). Finally, he noticed me and had a similiar interest. We started hanging out and going on dates as much as our parents would allow. After about a month of dating, and following him to church services, we started a bible study. Now, I must say–church was not my "thing" before Collin. I would say I was a christian, but I didn't know or realize what they truly was about. The bible study was a relationship study and the chapter we were on was about witnessing. As we were going over our weekly discussion, I broke into tears, and could feel my heart breaking before me. The Lord did a work in me that day through the bible study and through Collin, and I became a follower of Christ. Now, after 5 1/2 years of dating, we are happily married. I have never been happier, and I have never felt more blessed.
i blogged about her.
actually, in all seriousness, i ran away from her to do missions in sarajevo, bosnia with campus crusade. long story, but god eventually persuaded me over there to pursue her for marriage. it was nuts.
Dude- that is awesome.
Is it okay that I am laughing about the bees? Thanks for sharing!
I don't know what I was smoking when I did that lol. God is good!
Tony,
Our 1st Christmas together…so we had been dating about 7 months–I gave her a photo album. And the photo album contained about 14 pictures in with specific dates and the location, etc, etc.. Very cool photos that I put in a sweet book. And each photo represented things like the pew at the church when I first saw her; to the room at the church where we first talked, to our first few dates, etc, etc. Basically I had written in my journal dates on all these events and captured them in a photo album with just a photo of the place…no people…just the photo and dates. She was pretty much blown away…my attention to detail, that I had written about it, etc, etc….sort of seems stalkerish now that I'm writing it out…but it was sweet I promise. Her parents were also blown away…
rhett
Wow – Rhett the scrapbooking wooer – nice! Thanks for sharing man.
I just went "Hey you, woman! Me, you, marriage!"
She accepted
Was that before or after you killed dinner? HAHA!
Several times, I invited this really cute guy to come to my college youth group. One Wednesday evening, I looked down the long, church driveway and saw his little, red pickup truck coming up the drive. I began to run towards him, waving my arms wildly. As I neared the truck I realized it was not the guy I had invited, but instead this other guy, who’s name I barely knew. I tried to tone down my greeting, but it was too late. He had seen me and was so impressed that I was coming to meet him. I did not tell him it was a case of mistaken identity until I had pulled him in, hook, line, and sinker. We have been together ever seen. A total of thirty-two happily married years!
I was working at a convienience store the first time I saw him…I was blown away when he walked through the door, gorgeous!!!!!So when he came to the counter with his Red Rock and to pay for his gas, of course I flirted…He started coming in everyday after that, and we became friends…One night I tried to give him my phone number and he walks towards the door, AWAY from me and my phone number!!! He turned and said, "my number is in the book if you want to call me"…So he left and I was in shock. I have never minded being the pursuer but I wasnt sure if thats what he wanted…all the signs were there that he liked me but for him to not take my number made me feel as if I had mis-read the signs. So a few days later I looked his number up in the phone book and called. We have been together now for over 8 years…Ups and downs, yes, we have had them. But you cant fight God's plan! He knows what he is doing!!!
My husband and I meet thru our jobs. He lived in Canada and I lived in Georgia, so alot of our dates were via phone so we had date night on Fridays and we would send care packages to each other that could not be open until our date. In these packages would be things that we liked or showed an interest, and then some just because items. We have celebrated our 10th anniversary this past Sept.
That is a really cool idea!
I'm one of those people who have to see evidence on almost everything – and then check it again to make sure I interpreted it correctly the first time. Though I had some initial hesitancy, I ultimately trusted it was the Lord's hand leading and pulling Amanda and I together. He'd made it pretty clear to me that was what was supposed to happen; I just had to follow His lead. I'm glad He closed the some 900-mile distance between us and kept us together since. He's taught us a great deal over the last 10 years and I hope we will incline our ears even more to His calling and desire for us as a couple and as a family.
Thanks for Sharing Mitch! – good times!
We have a lot of couples that are a part of the Internet Campus that first met online. Interesting to see the relational values that can exist!
Well, the Steward story is a fun one. We had our first date the summer after we both graduated highschool and then we went away to colleges that were 10 hours apart. Our relationship grew through the calling cards and email and letters we sent each other for that first semester. Then towards the end of winter break we decided to go out to a nice dinner and a "prom" sort of idea since we didn't get the chance to do something like that meeting just after highschool.
As we drove home from dinner Mandy started talking about how one of her roomates had told her that she was going to come back engaged, and laughed about it. And I asked, "Well, what would you say?" … silence … I don't remember what she said exactly but we both agreed that God was in the midst of our relationship.
Then an hour later I asked her to marry me… and she said yes!! Haha, I won't go down in the record books for ever being a patient person. But God worked through our relationship, we were engaged for 2.5 years with a majority of it a long distance relationship – so it had to be God!! Four babies later and almost 9 years of marriage – and I am so glad I asked her to marry me that night!
Brandon and I met in college. We were both "seeing" other people but instantly became close friends. It took a while for us to get together but once we did, we knew within just a few months that we were "meant to be". I'm so thankful for our marriage and that I get to enjoy life right beside him
Here is the pursuers side of the story…lol. I met this incredibly beautiful woman (Christi D) in college. She was smart, beautiful, and she kicked butt on the college tennis team. We became very good friends even as she continued to date other people. I was single at the time. She had bewitched me heart and soul (name that movie?). Finally, I got the nerve to lay it all on the line after about a year or more into our friendship. She was still dating someone, but I had a plan. I knew it would work. I was brave and ready. I asked her to decide, the guy she was dating or me…she picked him. Seriously!
But you all know the end (or I should say the start) to the story. She finally came to her senses and realized we were too perfect for each other. She was worth the wait…going on 14 years of marriage!
Here is the pursuers side of the story…lol. I met this incredibly beautiful woman (Christi D) in college. She was smart, beautiful, and she kicked butt on the college tennis team. We became very good friends even as she continued to date other people. I was single at the time. She had bewitched me heart and soul (name that movie?). Finally, I got the nerve to lay it all on the line after about a year or more into our friendship. She was still dating someone, but I had a plan. I knew it would work. I was brave and ready. I asked her to decide, the guy she was dating or me…she picked him. Seriously!
But you all know the end (or I should say the start) to the story. She finally came to her senses and realized we were too perfect for each other. She was worth the wait…going on 14 years of marriage!
I'm going on 10 years of marriage. I'm very thankful for this series as i always thought that if I don' t do something different from my parents I will definitely get a divorce. I plan to study and invest in my marriage like Microsoft studies IT technologies, like Bruce Lee studied martial arts or like Carl Sagan studied the stars.
Payday, October first, I went to Chess King in the mall and told the sales girl I wanted the whole outfit. I intentionally wore old sweat pants so I could go to the JC Penneys bathroom and change into my new duds. I did. My master plan was on track. I then walked across teh parking lot to the "Red Onion", restaurant/dance club. I met one of my buddies there early in the evening. Our plan was to get a table by the door and scope out the doors in order to see what girls walked in alone or in groups. So far, so good.
Jackpot! A group of about 6 girls walked in. I danced with one of the girls. As I sat back down, the she walked up to our table and asked if she could sit down. We talked and danced and she gave me her number. I went out to sea the next day (Tuesday) until Friday. I called her when the ship pulled in and we went on our first date (back to same club). We were married two weeks later on the 19th. That was 23 years ago.
Moral of the story…..dumb, immature, "guy plans" work
I do not use this story when I meet with couples for pre-marital counseling.
I am now a pastor. go figure.